Saturday, August 28, 2010

Unplanned plans


A friend texted as I was commuting home from class.  My route home would pass his high rise so we decided to meet up.  Coincidentally, just as I finished making those plans, I got a call from another friend who was going to be in the area and wanted to know if I was free to meet up.


Three friends found themselves getting together for a quiet unplanned evening of random chatter and catch up.


If both had called and texted any later, I would've been home and the evening would not have happened.

I'm all for planning, in fact, I'm all about planning. One thing I never thought it would make me realize is that it definitely makes me appreciate serendipitous moments like these.

Friday, August 20, 2010

Weight Frustrate

After gaining back 20 of the 30 pounds i lost last year, I find myself here again. The same spot I have found myself at for the last 20-something years. Sometimes it takes me a few weeks to find myself back on track, sometimes months. Point is, I'm here. Again. For the last time. Again. This is it! Again.

It's that point when I've finally convinced myself that I am ready yet again, to FINALLY beat the bulge.

I've done the usual round of preparations: figured out the permutation of steps I'll take this time around to get me to that magic number, mentally plotted how the next few months should unfold, day-dreamed about the shopping trip I'll reward myself with as inspiration.

So I'm feeling physically and mentally ready. I'm feeling confident, almost cocky that things will go smoothly these next few months. But really, that feeling isn't so new. It's the same cycle of emotions I go through on this crazy ride I've been. But I'm glad I'm finally here again.

So here's the plan:
It took me a little over half a year to loose the 30 pounds last year. I'm hoping to accomplish the same thing in half the time. 30 pounds by December 20 is Phase 1. Going crazy and going for gold.

Will this time be different? I'd always like to think so. So wish me luck yet again as I traverse down this well-trodden road hopefully for the last time.

Monday, August 16, 2010

Urge


Wow.. kamusta naman ang deluge ng posts diba? I guess I wanna get it out (into Cyberspace!) before I cycle again and it gets buried behind work and what not.

I work in an office with ALOT of smokers - infact, my cubicle is right behind the pantry - where all the smoking happens. Seeing ashtrays and being in cigarette smoke has become so common place again that I'm scared I will one day just subconsciously pick me up a stick and light up. 

I actually have nightmares about smoking. I'll be smoking in my dream and it'll be so real. It's a nightmare because I really REALLY do not want to start smoking again, nor do I have any plans on doing so. Temptation admittedly is there sometimes, and really gotta to consciously hold out so as not to give in and start up again. 

*shudder* 

Sunday, August 15, 2010

In Other News...

I just realized when texting with a friend that in the last round of payments I made this morning,  I FINISHED PAYING OFF MY SECOND PHASE DEBT.

Oh happy day!

I have a last and final round of debt to take care of. While the debt pseudo exists (ie: it's so in the past that I think my lender has already called it even), I think it would be nice if I paid it. I think my lender will be pleasantly surprised with me too.

Now.. where do I fit it in? Before the two big purchases I want to do between now and the end of next year? In between or after? Hmm..

This.. ehm.. situation I've had with my finances over the last so many years has gotten me so crazy about my finances that I watch everything like a hawk now. I spend when I want to spend but everything is budgeted, tracked and accounted for. I guess that's a good thing huh? Not that I want to admit it but I do get a bit of a nerdish thrill when I open up my excel document to account for and study my finances. Hee.

Weddings & Whatnot


Coordinated my first solo wedding recently and it totally served me a huge chunk of anxiety that I never thought I could have.

I remember rushing to the chapel to set up by myself and already feeling pretty harassed. As I started distributing the printed misalettes onto the benches, the fans that were on kept blowing them away. I remember feeling very alone at this point, with nothing but my own shoulder to cry on. Yes, very dramatic of me I know, lol..  but seriously, this is exactly how I was feeling.

Then I remember getting ready to pin the corsages on the ninongs / ninangs and learning that the corsages from the florist DID NOT COME WITH PINS. It was one of those smaller details I never thought to ask about.. I always assumed corsages would come with pins?!

I remember trying to round up the ninongs / ninangs with the bridal entourage. It was a little nuts- half of the party wasn't there, those that were there kept milling about, it was looking to rain already and I was being asked a million and one questions. I remember wanting to just curl up into a fetal position and rock myself to sleep.

Then in the middle of the ceremony, it started to rain... hard. I had no idea how on earth I was going to move the party from the ceremony to the reception. Eeeeeeep.

So there were a bunch of these episodes that occurred prior to and during the wedding. Regardless of how I felt, I needed to smile, push forward and concentrate on getting the job done well.. or at least to the best of my abilities.

While I'm griping about all these small details that made my experience, well.. interesting.. in the greater scheme of things, things went relatively smoothly. The family has been very generous with their appreciation so at the end of the day, if they're happy, then I'm happy too.  Some moments that seemed pretty horrific at the time will probably (hopefully) be remembered with great fondness over the years. Shortly after the wedding I remember reminiscing already with some members of the family and erupting into a fit of giggles as we recalled the "voice of God" (ie: the laptop that was hooked up to the sound system) announcing the time in middle of the rites of marriage.

Times like these.. it's so easy to get lost in the details. Greater effort is required from your end to remember why you agreed to do something like this in the first place. During these trying times, you realize just how annoying useless others can be but in the same regard, you really REALLY appreciate the people who do their job well, and those who go out of their way to help you, even if its not their job to do so.

What's up Weekend


Checked out the first public school my foundation first did a renovation projects at years ago. We want to do a number of projects at one school, take a few years off.. then come back and work with them again, just to keep the relationship going.

The school has changed lots since we were there - they've gone from twenty something classrooms to thirty something instructional rooms - bringing down their classroom population from 120 to 90 kids. I was happy to hear that subjects are now 1 hour long - but it makes me wonder about the teachers and administrators who have to cover two shifts- one from 5:45 - 2, then from 2 - 9.  Experiences like this never fall short of helping me realize just how lucky I am.

Speaking of lucky, I spent the weekend "sick" - with a pounding earache discharging all sorts of grossness and newly diagnosed Seborrhoeic dermatits.  TMI perhaps but why lucky you ask? Having gotten sick a few times over the last month reminds me that I'm I really need to stop abusing my body and must take better care of myself. I could've gotten sick with something worse diba? Must traverse down this road to health faster!

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Can't Wait

  • Facial
  • Manicure / pedicure
  • Massage
  • Haircut
  • Jogging
  • Spacing out & winding down before bed
Not necessarily in that order, but will definitely make time for that SOON. My frazzled hair and bad skin are calling out for some R&R. 


Thursday, August 5, 2010

what the: nickname

I have one of those names that can shortened / abbreviated, which is actually amusing because I have a really short name to begin with.

My shortened nickname is probably my most common nickname.  I didn't give myself the nickname, nor do I introduce myself using that name. People who call me by this nickname are people whom I've known long enough to be comfortable around them.

Thats why I'm always really thrown off when I meet someone new and they immediately start calling me by my nickname.

May tawag dyan.... :) 

Unsolicited


Multiple deadlines looming near - some planned, some out of no where. Necessary errands building up, loitering dangerously near D-day(s). Calls, emails, commitments threatening to spill out my ears and over my head. Every hour and minute necessarily accounted for. Heart's picking up its pace. Shallow breathing...then bam! A meeting is cancelled, a rendezvous postponed. Unplanned, achingly welcomed pocket of free time that snaps open into your rigid schedule. Light and air breath into day as you're hit with a free pass to address the eternal whiny lament of: THERE ISN'T ENOUGH TIIIIMMMMMMEEEEE. You breathe...

So what do you do with this free time? A smart choice would probably be to reshuffle your tasks for the day, stretch out the pile of of things you originally had to accomplish in so many hours, into a time frame that makes you more hopeful that you'll actually finish everything you had set out to do for the day.

Or you procrastinate relax. Breathe. Take a nap. Play. Drink a cup of coffee.

What would you do?

Monday, August 2, 2010

Smart Snack


You gotta agree - this is absolutely genius, having all your favorite chips mixed together in one snack pack?! Genius I tell you, absolutely genius.