Where Do I Begin

In a few weeks:
... I'll be turning 29
... I'll be celebrating 1-year at this design firm that I love
... I'll be starting a new chapter in my life

No, I'm not pregnant, lol.

A universe of emotions are whirling in my head, so strong I physically feel it. So many blessings to be thankful for, so many things to do, so sad, so nervous, so excited. So overwhelming.. i wanna crawl into bed and not think about anything, lol.

No, but seriously, God's timing, while sometimes amusing, is perfect.

Life can mosey about at such a yawn-inducing pace. At this lazy stride you can see everything, plan everything, anticipate everything. Then BAM.

Gosh, where to begin, where to begin.

Blessings 112510

1. Learned that a few of us will be receiving a surprise treat at the end of the month.  My second since I started! Grateful that my hardwork is being appreciated at all levels, and am excited to bring it to the next level.

2. Client forwarding an email exchange between their company's 2 marketing groups, sharing between themselves how excited they were about the material we were going to produce and exclaiming how much they enjoyed working with us. Grateful to be part of a team who does inspiring work and to work with people who appreciate what we do.

3. Silver Lining Moment: thrown off (put off rather) by an exchange with someone. Blessed as it helped me recognize that I shouldn't allow anyone's actions to drag me down, dictate how I feel or set the tone for the rest of my day.

4. Coming home early. While I brought work home, glad to have the opportunity to come home and see my family still awake.

5. Expecting to only find purchases I had agreed to having purchased, blessed to have a Mom who bought me something extra anyway

Stalone's New Playmate

Mom called me about a month ago asking me if I wanted to avail of this promo that was being offered to her - some Blackberry Mobile model for some amount paid over so many months with no interest. I did my research and it was a pretty good deal -  the minimum amount wasn't so bad, and the phone itself was getting a lot of good reviews from friends who had the same phone. I began daydreaming about how it would help boost work productivity and really began considering availing of it.

Then a few days later, for no apparent reason at all, I decided I didn't need it: the money could go somewhere else, and I would survive at work w/o one.

A few weeks later I saw that a friend was selling a QWRTY nokia phone. Ever since I had left my E71i in a cab years ago, I had always dreamed I'd get one again someday. Could this day be it? The phone was hardly used, it was a great model and the price was pretty good!

Few days later,  for no apparent reason at all, I decided I didn't it: my phone was perfectly fine. 

Then about 2 weeks my phone started acting up. With too many messages it wouldn't register the person's name in the inbox and every once in a while, reception would get incredibly wonky. Not so good for someone who communicates for a living. 

Didn't stress about it too much though as I figured the phone would last. 

Then a week ago, my tito called me. His office had given him a new phone as a secondary line and for one reason or another, he preferred not to use it. He called asking if I wanted to switch phones with him. 

So now I find myself in possession of this pretty white thing, and couldn't be anymore grateful :) Meet Jean-Claude. Isn't he purty?! 

Always so amazed at how the Universe works. Never ceases to amaze me. 

photo credit: http://nokiae72whiteedition.com/index.php

Blessings: 24 Oct - 20 Nov (Part 1)

While waiting for my work files to upload, I decided to finish updating my facebook albums.

Now while THOSE are uploading, thought I'd post something new here. Had no idea a MONTH had already past since I last did this exercise!

Anyway, here are a few I noted the week of after I got back from my trip to Vietnam / Cambodia, as well as a few more from the last week:

Trip related:

1. 

Lower forex and thus spending less than what I expected to spend when I had to buy a flight last minute.

2.

 Getting to Cambodia safely despite several bus breakdowns. 

3. 

Despite initially wanting to bus back, glad we ended up staying an extra day in Siem Reap where we spent the whole morning just recharging and lounging around the hotel. Didn't realize how exhausted I had been till I had the opportunity to sleep for more than 4 hours! lol

4. 

Exploring sites and sounds of Siem Reap & Ho Chi Minh. 

5.

Special mention goes out to seeing the amazing temples around  Siem Reap such as 

Angkor Wat, Ta Prohm and Bayon

6. 

Having lucked out with all our hotel and food choices. 

Blessings: 17 Oct - 23 Oct

If I can't keep it up daily anymore, let me see if I can at least recap weekly a few of many instances to be grateful for.

(1) First time for family to sit down COMPLETE for a meal, with homemade Hainanese Chicken Rice no less

(2) Potential shoot problems working their way out such as knowing organizer of one location & wonderful weather

(3) Surviving & celebrating the craziness of this week

(4) New places: Legaspi Market, Filipinas Heritage Library, top of Makati Stock Exchange & empty Tower One

(5) Learning to put my foot down & picking up lessons for future like-experiences

(6) Kiddie games + adult vices = a good time

(7) Jogging.. even if only for 2 nights this week

(8) Seeing the magic of production crew at work & appreciating genius behind capturing a moving picture

(9) Holiday = sleeping in + finishing a book

(10) Acknowledgment for work accomplished this week

On Friends & Nothingness

Saw a good friend recently. Over lunch I began fielding calls from work and then over dessert, she took out some papers to do some number crunching for work while I flipped through a magazine. 

It was an afternoon of catch-up, the deepest-of-the-deep kind of conversation, insubstantial chatter and many moments of nothingness.  

When you aren't compelled to put on a song a dance because each other's company is entertainment enough, when you can truly be comfortable doing nothing and still feel like you had the best time in the world.. then you know you are in the company of a true friend. And I am reminded, time and again, of how lucky I am to be blessed with people like this in my life. 

5 Weddings and a Camera

My level of desire rises and falls depending on what's currently going on in my life, but the deep seeded obsession longing is always there. It's been an unhealthy fixation I must admit.

This post obviously means that I am nearing neurosis... once again.

I'm still mulling over whether or not I want to start with a great point and shoot or a dslr. Lumix or canon?! Canon or Nikon?! Quiapo, Hong Kong or Singapore?

Parallel to that.. when (and where!) do I squeeze it into my financials? Can I even free up some money in my budget?

Speaking of budget , to date I have 5 weddings within the next 365 days that I'd like to attend, all in different pockets of the world.

Now would be a good time to find me a pot of gold.

Work Load

One month in and I feel like I've been with the group forever.

My current priorities, plus all the "smaller" priorities I'm finishing up for the year are keeping me busy, busier than I've been in a while. I find myself incredibly spent at the end of the day.

Some days I wonder if I've bitten off more than I can chew and long for consecutive days where I can stay up all night, sleep in all day, roll around, slow down my days and dilly dally all I want. I don't know how others manage to squeeze in the world, and then some. I'll get to that point someday soon I hope!

Most days I'm very happy with where I'm at. I'm happy to be moving forward, to be committing 200% to something and pushing myself to grow.

I'm anxious to get to that point where work happily balances out with my personal life and I don't feel like I've thrown myself under a bus every time I wake up in the morning. In the meantime, I'm having a good time trying to balance it out.

I'm eager to learn and excited about the projects I'm handling, the people I'm working with and the characters I'm meeting. I'm excited about growing in my new role and becoming real good at what I'm doing.

And while it ain't the kind of green I was hoping to be earning at this point, I'm grateful for a steady paycheck and the wisdom that comes with having run amuck with your finances at one point in your life.

So yes, tired bliss is where I'm at at the moment, and where I'll probably nest and make my home in for the next year.

But I haven't forgotten about my other plans! And don't forget about them too. They're still there. On hiatus for the moment and waiting to be revisted at some point next year.

10 years ago...

Before I get lost in my 28th year - thought I'd take the opportunity to look back and see where I was 10 years ago.

10 years ago...

...I was 18! First minute into my birthday began with a surprise bedroom visitor who came bearing 18 roses. The day ended with a surprise party thrown by my friends at home. Birthdays have been mellower over the last few years, but they have been, and still are, celebrated with the people I love most.

...I was a high school senior: studying, theater, central student government, and the school paper. Very much ontop of my sh*t. Life got a little more challenging after. Lol.

... I was being chauffeured around by a driver, in the loveliest of cars. Circumstances have changed since then. I am now a MASTER commuter!

... I spoke a drop of Tagalog. Now I speak a drizzle of Tagalog, a shower of bastardized Taglish & a deluge of gayspeak.

...I became a college freshman at the Ateneo.. & experienced the biggest culture shock of my life. First two classes? Women's Ping Pong & Filipino. Oh lordy.

... I 'moved out' - began renting an apartment facing school and experienced living by myself for the first time ever.

...I began what is now a life-long love affair with the ACGC. 'Nuf said.

...I got over one love &  re-fell in love with whom I thought was my one true love - oh boy. *insert rolling eyes emoticon*. Really glad that long and dragging chapter is over and done with.

... my little sisters were 15 & 10, and I towered over them. Now they tower over me.

... I got my driver's license! And still haven't driven since :D

... I wasn't really sure what I wanted to do with my life. And after 4 years in college, 5 years as an entrepreneur, a few months as a project manager, HR consultant and now a design manager, I still don't know. But finally enjoying trying to figure it out.

I thought by now I would've ruled the world - become a famous stage actress, or a high powered corporate robot or a respected media mogul. Then again, I thought I'd be "there" by 25, wherever that there was. Things haven't really turned out that way, but you know what's, that's ok. My life has been blessed and for that I'm grateful.

It's been a week into my 28th year and so far, so good. Great actually! Should be a kick-ass year.

Brave New World

Fast turn of events and not part of my original plans, but then again, much of life's excitement comes from these unexpected twists and turns.

After a year and some of jumping around, I'm finally committing. And after six years of running around on my own time, I'm tying myself down. Lol, and as much as I wish I was referring to finding my soulmate and agreeing to spend the rest of my life with him, I'm not.

So yes, I am nervous for a whole well of reasons I'd rather not disclose. And yes, part of me is already beginning to miss some of the perks of a life that will change beginning Monday.

But, I'm excited. For the wealth of lessons I will learn, for the stirring of passion that I know is still smoldering somewhere within and for the forward steps I hope I am taking towards a life of purpose and joy.

So here's to luck, luck and more luck as I begin a new life on the week of my 28th birthday.

Miraculous Money Matters 2

I first blogged about about money here.

And I still do believe in miraculously money matters. That even when you don't think you have the money to cover your monthly expenses, opportunities for money making (for the most part anyway), unexpectedly arise.

At the moment, my current / upcoming financial responsibilities are at an all time high and yet gratefully, despite this, I'm actually making enough money for the month to cover my bills. Just last week I was banging my head trying to figure out how I'd earn enough income this month, so this is actually surprise out-of-the-blue money!

On the same note, this is the most money I've made in a while. Which is wonderful! But on a sadder note, I'm a little glum thinking about how all that money could have gone to my savings (& a little splurge for me!) instead of my bills.

Lol, oh wells. This is temporary anyway. Hopefully the next time I blog about money, it's I'm trying to figure out how and where to spend my money because I have too much of it ;)

Back On Stage?

Made a small return to the stage 2 years ago after I auditioned for a show produced by this new theater and events group. I've been quite lucky with them as since that first show, I've been involved in a number of their shows, both off and on stage.

This year, I didn't get around to audition for their annual theater event due to a personal conflict in schedule. I reasoned that I needed to focus on what was (and is currently still!) on my plate, and was convinced I couldn't do both.

A few weeks after the auditions (that I didn't attend), I started feeling differently. I planned on getting in touch with them and letting them know that I wanted to help out with the show, as a actor or otherwise. Though I dwelt on it for a while, I kept putting it off. I eventually gave up on the idea as with the show dates fast approaching, I thought it would be too makapal for me to ask.

Today though, I randomly bumped into the group's president. The first thing she said to me after a hug was "I need you!". She told me how she was looking for someone to fill a role and had thought of me. She figured since I didn't audition, I was busy with the job I was telling her I'd have by now during last year's show. She put the message out into the universe in hopes it would conspire to help her.. and conspire it did! For the both of us!

Now I have no idea if it will work out logistically; we still need to talk specifics. Not that I want to turn a deaf ear to opportunity knocking but I'm a bit overwhelmed as it is right now with what's going on in my life. Hopefully all it will take to get me through the next few weeks is diligent focus, hard work, baby steps, self confidence and prayers.

Nonetheless, I'm thrilled! The surprise source of income is as welcome as it is needed, as is the chance to pour my energies into a creative outlet I've always loved. Acting freaks me out as much as it exhilarates me so it's definitely an opportunity to stretch my realm of self-awareness. I always come out of a show feeling like I know myself just a little bit more.

So fingers crossed!

(photo of myself and a fellow actress in a show I did last year; taken by S.Purdue)

2009: A Review (Part I)

2009 was a year of transition, like the start of a vibrant new life where it almost feels like I relearned how to do everything. Sometimes I still do feel like I'm groping my way about, but having so much more fun doing it this time around.

Before letting myself loose into the new decade, thought it best to review the year that just past.

I realized I got to do a whole lot of traveling this year. And not just physical trips mind you! But let me being with that...

There were a lot of TRIPS, both local and abroad...

(Tokyo, Japan in January for THREE; first time here!)

(Tali, Batanagas in February)

(Cagayan de Oro for a quick 24 hours with the ACS; photo c/o J.Galindo)

(Cruise of Palawan in May, a first for me! Both on a cruise and to the places we visited)

(Pandan Island in Mindoro Oriental in May; another first!)

(Taipei, Taiwan in August for a festival)

(San Francisco, California in August to visit friends)

(Chicago, Illinois in August to be a ninang at a confirmation and to visit newly wed friends)

(Boston, Massachusetts in August to visit friends and to sing for a memorial mass)

(NYC & NJ in August to visit friends and be MOH at a friend's wedding!)

(Boracay in November to celebrate a friend's birthday)

I EXPLORED a lot of Manila as well, where I learned to embrace (albeit sometimes a strangled embrace..) commuting and see OLD PLACES WITH NEW EYES...

(Taguig)


(Divisoria)

(Ateneo)


(Metropolitan Museum of Art)

(Even my own village!)

I EXPLORED MORE by visiting NEW places (well, at least in my eyes) around the metropolis, learning more about the city that has been my home for the last 13 years...

(Bangkal)

(Salcedo Market)

(Ayala Museum)

(Manila Ocean Park)

And as much as I was able to explore the external world around me, I spent a lot of time this year doing a lot of searching and growing within as well.

Wow my corniness is starting to make me gag..

Lol, but seriously, I kid you not! What would a year of experiences be without some more insight into yourself right? But more about that in the next installment.

Giving Back

One of the best things that came out of the business I set up with friends was the foundation we put up. It began as our company's CSR program but grew into a personal project for one of my partners and myself. We fought about a lot of things, but giving back to our country in this particular way was one of the things we DID agree about.

One particular organization has been so happy with us, our cause and the way we run our projects, that we have been asked to run three simultaneous project sites for them this year. This is a huge jump from the the single site events we've done for them in the past. They have also referred us to another program and we are now meeting with them to discuss the possibility of running a similar event or project with them in the next few months. We also look to be running a similar setup up north next year.

We've been at it now for a few years, and I'm excited that it has slowly been growing; the list of schools we work with has been growing, as our the number of events, the activities we do and the lives of the students we are touching. It is rewarding and incredibly satisfying on so many levels.

Our most challenging event to date is coming up fast and we're scrambling to get things up and running. Fingers crossed!